June 12, 2003
Talked into it.
Wanna know what has my @$$ chapped today? I have been challenged to be "Butt honest" and share with all of you exactly why I am feeling all hostile and irritable. I have a dehumidifier running right now in my "Garden apartment," in which the windows are all nailed shut. Dehumidifier=heat, nailed windows=no ventilation. As I sit there in the heat, my blood is boiling over my new circumstances. A little over a year ago I had a gorgeous wife, a beautiful home, 2 dogs that just rocked, and was looking so forward to starting a family. Before any of you hit me with "But Broch, it's just stuff....," don't go there. This isn't 100% about the stuff, but about having a home (not just a house,) a wife that I completely trusted with my life, a clearly defined future, and the planning of bringing our children into the world.
Yes, it is ALSO about the stuff. Just because I am practicing voluntary simplicity doesn't mean that I don't like to be surrounded by nice things. It means that I understand the opportunity cost of HAVING the nice things, and am willing to concede to that. People, I barely have room to THINK in my new place. What little is left of my belongings is stacked from floor to ceiling in what should be my bedroom. I guess that I am going to have to get rid of pretty much what little that I have left from my life.
The one thing that I have escaped with is my character, my mind and my dignity. Other than that, I have a 12 year old truck, my computer, my stereo, and an ex that I don't trust very much anymore.
Good Fcuking night.
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